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It’s Time To Get Used To Disability

It took me a while, but I got over it.

I’ve encountered a pretty vast array of people with disabilities. Regardless of having lived with paralysis for some time, as I became involved in the broader disability community, I found it a little daunting and strange. But in time, I got used to pretty much anything.

But I understand that apparent disabilities takes some getting used to.

Some are easier than others on the initial encounter. I know that I’m pretty easy. People are pretty used to paraplegia. I’m just a guy who happens to be sitting down. The fact that my modern ultralight wheelchair looks more like the sophisticated mobility tool that it is rather than a medical device makes it that much easier.

People are even having an easier time with limb loss. Prosthetic legs have become pretty common. We see lots of people on Facebook who are dancing or doing karate or skateboarding with one leg – or none. Not such a big deal as it used to be, is it?

But step it up a bit, and people have a harder time. Spastic movement. Drooling. Quadriplegia, in which a person has less or little use of their hands and arms. Facial disfigurement from burns or radiation. Use of a portable ventilator. Affected speech. Small stature, especially when the person’s body proportions are notably different from the norm. Blindness or deafness, even, can really set some people back.

I know some of the reasons why these encounters throw people for a loop, because I ask the question in group training sessions I give in the workplace. They are what most of you would expect: sympathy, imagining it could be you, expecting it is a hard life to live, wondering what to say or do, or just a sort of visceral revulsion. Among other things.

These kinds of reactions are reflexive and automatic and essentially impossible to prevent (that is until you’ve had enough experience with it, like I have).

But really you can relax. They’re just people. Much more like yourself than you probably realize. That is, until you get the experience. That’s the ultimate lesson. Just people.

More than ever before, they are people who are living at a higher level of independence and participation. Even people with what you would consider a very significant disability are more likely to have pursued their talents and interests, gotten an education, and are putting themselves out there to contribute in the workplace.

They are pretty used to people being initially uptight about their apparent disability (or not-so-apparent disability once it gets revealed). But they don’t have a lot of time to wait for a recruiter or interviewer to get over that initial first reaction when that person is having to make some pretty quick decisions that will affect their future. Their very life.

Especially in the workplace, anyone involved with disability and employment needs to get past these initial reactions pretty quickly. They could miss out on, or lose, a pretty valuable employee, just because they can’t relax.

When you can truly relax in the presence of a disability, then you can connect with the real person, find out who they are, what they have to offer, and determine the role they can play as partners in your – and your organization’s – success.

The only way to tap into the emerging and significant pool of talent with disability is to get to that place of being able to relax when you have the encounter.

That’s why this is a critical training priority. More than one survey of upper managers confirm that they know that this is what they need.

It might mean a lot to your workplace. It might mean a lot to you. It might mean a lot to someone you care about deeply.

So, really. You can relax. People are people. Even someone with a significant, apparent disability. Get what you need – be it a class or the chance to hang out with these people – so you can get there like I did.